A Sea Monster Attacked My Little Sister

My little sister is a huge Jane Austen fan. Reading Sense and Sensibility and Pride and Prejudice each year means so much to her. Now, I'm a Bronte girl. We mock each other over it. I'll say Elizabeth is whiny, then she'll counter with Jane is mopey--on and on. Then we'll patch things up, laughing about how our husbands won't dig us up Heathcliff-like when we die---the callous bastards.

So you'd think I'd relish (being a big sister, fantasy-sometimes-horror writer, zombie-loving, constant wisea**) telling her about Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters and Pride, Prejudice and Zombies. I didn't. It's just so, so, so wrong defiling such great pieces of literature.

I knew she'd see them at Barnes and Noble and squeal WHAT!--justifiably so. At our age we don't care what people think, so she wouldn't be embarrassed. I just wanted to be the one to break it to her so we could be side by side at Barnes and Noble and squeal in unison.

You see, satire is the lowly wise-cracking fool who mocks an arrogant king who needs to be knocked down a few pegs, not some punk teepeeing the pantheon of the great literary gods for a buck.

Yay! I Almost Won . . .

the errant parent Thanksgiving-themed Top Nine List contest! Runner-up feels pretty good. I hope you'll check my close-but-no-cigar entry and find my tips helpful.

*whimper, licks wound* One of the prizes was bourbon.

Next on my agenda is this survey: What do you think of my new background and its complimentary colors?

1. Cool!

2. Ummm, reminds me of a mural you'd see on a '70's tripped-out van, only stupider. Oh, by the way, thanks for the groovy yet made-me-feel-old-cultural reference.

3. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarg my retinas!

4. You're weird. I'm going to go write now.

Innsmouth Monster Byte

Innsmouth Free Press posted my piece "Karaoke Machine Malfunction Renders Local Pub Patrons Deaf". Crafting a news story was a nice change of pace . I perused A Walking Tour of Innsmouth and assumed intrepid-reporter duty for a spell. Disturbing things occur in this charming town, folks. Between you and me, I sensed strange forces at work even though I reported the facts and only the facts. ;-)

NaNo: Sesame Street Homage

Happy 40th B-Day, Sesame Street.* You're the best. I love this Kermit and Don Music bit. Tis fitting for NaNo, no?

*Thanks for bringing this to my attention, BT.

At That Precise Moment

I can't believe I've never posted on this topic.

So, Bec, when did you know you were a writer? Well, I can relive the moment any time I want, thank you very much.

Romancing the Stone (a freebie on Netflix) premiered in 1984. I watched the beginning and 4 mins and 11 secs into the movie came my Epiphany: YES, I'LL DO EXACTLY THAT WHEN I GROW UP!

Then I laughed my ass off. Still do.

NaNo: The Odd Couple

Yup, I got Oscar in the morn, Felix at night.*

So, my novel's working title is What A Little Moonlight Can Do.* It's a romantic comedy with fantasy thrown in, of course. I'll confess I'm having a real hard time writing slobly* or Oscar-like. I force myself not to edit as I go. It's the primary reason I'm participating-- to break my exhausting habit of self-editing.

I'll also confess that once I achieve my daily self-imposed word count of 1,700 each morn, I return to other WIPs at night and resume my Felix-like ways.

Some habits take time to break. I can't go cold turkey. Weaning, slowly weaning . . .

*For any spring chickens out there, Oscar and Felix are characters from the movie The Odd Couple, staring Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau. It's about two men that live together. Oscar is a slob, the other, Felix, a perfectionist. It's hysterical, especially Felix's allergy fits.

*It's the title a song I think is cute and whimsical.

*When you're a writing slob you get to make up words. Shakespeare was a huge slob.

Peter Straub Interview

This is perfect for Halloween, horror writer Peter Straub's thoughts on how to scare readers. Having never read the man's work, I can't recommend him. I very rarely read horror, but this article enticed me to give him a try.

What A Little Sport Can Do

Oh NaNoWriMo* is a comin'. Before this furious writing storm hits, I'm going to enjoy myself tonight at a Portland Pirates hockey game. Ahhh, invigorating fun. Check out nine-year-old Jr. Portland Pirate Oliver Wahlstom's amazing shot. The goalie's reaction is priceless. Have a great hat-trick-or-treat weekend.

*If you would like to buddy me . :-)

WIP Weds: *chirp, chirp*

Have you ever hootenannied at a masquerade ball and everyone died, victims of a horrible host who plagued all with disease*, and for some freaky reason you survived, clawed yourself out of the mass of cooling bodies --*deep breath*-- because there's this word you kept hearing that inexplicably drew you to it (you recalled some friends uttered it in the past, but you had no idea what they were referring to--*deep breath*--you smiled and nodded so not to look the uninformed idiot) so you crawled home to do a Wiki search, but it's a word that has consonant clusters that are odd, so it took awhile to uncover it until finally !success! That's the word: Cthulhu!

Anyone else experienced that? . . . *chirp, chirp* . . . no?. . . *chirp, chirp* . . . not even a little bit? . . . *titter* . . . just kidding.

Anyway, I read H.P. Lovecraft's "The Call of Cthulhu". Eh, it was okay.* If I understand correctly, Cthulhu Mythos is derived from this story and others. Many horror writers have built upon or derived inspiration from its theme of this evil god that resides within the depths of the earth just waiting to be unleashed and force all of humanity to watch reality-tv 24/7.* If you hear the call of Cthulhu, better pack for the loony bin.

Willing to give H.P. a second chance after so much Cthulhu hype*, I read more of his work, stumbling upon "The White Ship" and "What the Moon Brings" and "The Outsider" which I loooooooved-- "The White Ship" so much so I wrote a sequel to it.* Pity me, my Cthulhu search made me cocky and deluded.

Look, I'm not a horror writer, okay? Yeah . . .well . . . I'm not . . . got that? . . . *chirp*

*Poe things.

*Ummm, bigot much, H.P?

*I made that up. That scenario would be truly horrific for me.

*Don't get me wrong. I find the whole thing fascinating but shrine, tattoo, or stuff my personal library with it-- ah, no. I do lurk at Innsmouth Free Press thrice weekly. Good stuff.

*Poor "Ubiguitous Ink" always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Someday I'll commit and submit it.

Editing is a Bit**

As a writer I so identify with this dog. I edit my drafts this way kinda. Wrestling with them--should I, shouldn't I omit this?--my own worst enemy. My current WIP, big woofs. A total id vs. superego smackdown. Silly, silly me. :-)